Sunday, March 30, 2008

I Made a Plus Quilt.

Dear J Casa,
Consider yourself COPIED!
Mwh mwah mwah.

Friday, March 28, 2008

Seven Things I Think Are Lame

(To make this post more confusing, I've posted pictures of things I really love with text about things I despise. Because who photographs the lame stuff, unless it's really funny?)

One: My complete inability to post on my blog regularly, especially after mentioning something I am planning on posting and including the word "tomorrow". I'll tell you right now, people, "tomorrow" means nothing to me, because I am a bloggy liar. Sad but true.
Two: Bad movie adaptations. Current favorite to complain about? "The Natural," based, or should I say, "based" on the book of the same name by Bernard Malamud. You jerks, you stupid, stupid, jerks, you made a movie that is the EXACT OPPOSITE of the book. I hate you for it. If I were a high school English teacher, my entire course would be based on assigning students books to read that had horrible movie adaptations, and then giving them tests that allowed answers that could only be derived from only seeing the film. I would wait till the very end of the course to show them their grades, and Oh, I Would Laugh. This is because I like to see people who don't read suffer. And because I am mean.
Three: Getting my feet wet while wearing shoes, and also, my feet being cold, which they usually are. Enter, my new awesome boots. Do I NEED boots good for -40 degrees F in Kansas City? No, probably not. Does this stop me from wearing them? No, definitely not.
Four: Venetian blinds hanging unevenly. This irks me to no end. Also, piles of things that are not set at 90 degree angles to what they are sitting on. Sad, yes?
Five: People who talk too loudly in restaurants so as to let you know how much fun they're having. Also, people on cell phones in lines who tell crude stories or talk about specific people's flaws in front of strangers. Not only do your friends know you're a jerk, now we do too. Thanks.
Six: Time Warner Cable Customer Service. Enough said. Super super lame. Far worse than lame, really but I don't like to curse in writing.
Seven: Getting my sleeves wet while doing dishes or washing my hands. Getting my sleeves wet at any time really. It makes me crazy. I have to change when it happens.

So, now that I've shared a few of my little annoyances, who else would like to? This is an open invitation to anyone still bothering to read this wretched blog, but in particular, I am going to tag:

Other Rachel
Alicia (who might be too sweet to be annoyed by anything, I'm not sure)

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

I'm Exhausted. (And Parenthetical.)

After a day of rampant consumerism (which will be followed by the ceremonial day of returns), and several unintentionally long walks (all having to do with losing my house keys), I am too tired to type what I meant to, which is my variation of the meme that the fabulous Malka tagged me for. A variation, I say, because I have done 7 things about myself before, and they were not all that interesting then, so instead I am starting a mutant meme, (Is that even really a word? How is it pronounced? It's driving me insane.), where I am going to tell you about 7 things that irk me. Because I like complaining so much more than self discovery. Don't we all? Tomorrow.

Monday, March 17, 2008

Spring Break!

Thanks, everyone, for your tips and reassurances about the animal population of the household. It seems that we're slowly getting used to one another, sniffing under doorways, looking through the baby gate, and even cautiously sitting in the same room together on some nights. I have a million things I've meant to post about but haven't gotten around to, so here, first off, is Disappointing Zig Zag Quilt.Now, I'm not sure when the disappointment started, or what set it off exactly, but I know that it was culminated in the quilting of the beast. Everyone wonders why I do my crazy nonsense quilting? It's because I cannot quilt a straight line to save my life. Also, look at the shape of this thing! It's WAY too rectangular, which is only accentuated by the awful rumply quilting! And there's an "acceptable" amount of fabric bunching that I can live with, that I even enjoy, but what is happening in the middle of this quilt is enough to make me nauseous. And I was sure that the gray was the right choice, that it would set off the prints, but to me everything just ended up looking washed out and old. I had such high hopes. In fact, I cut enough squares for THREE of these quilts! Ha! The quilting gods are having a good long laugh at me now, I tell you. Sorry, squares, your destiny will never be to become the zig-zaggery you were intended for. I think I finished this quilt two weeks ago and couldn't bring myself to photograph it until yesterday. It has served as a fine cat pillow, though.
Anyway, moving on from that, this week is Spring Break! Now, english grammar does not dictate that those words be capitalized (although I think I should have capitalized "english"), but let me tell you, capitalization they do deserve. The fact that it's raining like crazy and I spent almost an hour in St.Patricks-Parade-Simultaneous-Downpour traffic this morning trying to get somewhere about a mile and a half away does not even damper my spirits so much, because no matter how lame what I am doing is, it is not working. Hooray for jobs at schools, I say, Hooray!Lastly, yesterday Baxter and I wandered upstairs and spent some time rearranging the old stash. I realize now that I have stash paralysis, that I have so much fabric now that when I try to find something to use I am stopped by the sheer magnitude of choices. And then, I become afraid to use anything, thinking I will surely need everything for another project, far more important than this one, and I go back downstairs. Sad, yes? Does anyone know a cure for this that doesn't involve getting rid of fabric? Because look at how ncely it is arranged now. And Baxter is enjoying his new couch.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Cats and Dogs

I'm currently confined to one room as we slowly acclimate Rufus to the ways of potty training. The transition of "cat family" to "cat dog family" is going fairly smoothly, but not long after my last post, the peace at my feet was disrupted. I don't know who instigated it or why, but there was barking, and that's enough to send the Beaster packing. It was the smarmy happy way I wrote about them, peaceful and quiet that set it off, I'm sure. I didn't knock on particle board. Oh well. Any tips for living peacefully with both species?

Saturday, March 1, 2008

I'm Jealous of Myself.

I apologize for my absence, but I have recently acquired several things which are taking up quite a bit of my time. One more than the others, admittedly, but who could blame him for it. Meet Rufus, the newest member of our family, and Baxter's (tentative) new best pal. As I type this, they are both laying at my feet, chilling out and getting used to one another. So, yay for woodchucks, thrift store finds, and homeless little doggies. (Not that they're homeless, but, well. You know what I mean.)